“Fool me once, shame…shame on…you. Fool me – can’t get fooled again!”

bush_shame_fool.jpgFrom “Bush Finds Lawyer to Use if Called in Leak Case”, the New York Times, June 3, 2004:

President Bush has met with a private lawyer whom he intends to hire to represent him if he is questioned as part of a grand jury investigation into the public disclosure of a C.I.A. undercover officer’s identity, the White House said Wednesday.
Mr. Wilson and some Democrats have charged that the White House leaked Ms. Plame’s identity as a way of retaliating against Mr. Wilson.

From Vice Presidential candidate Dick Cheney’s address to the Republican National Convention, August 2, 2000:

“George W. Bush will repair what has been damaged. He is a man without pretense and without cynicism. A man of principle, a man of honor. On the first hour of the first day…he will restore decency and integrity to the oval office. He will show us that national leaders can be true to their word…and that they can get things done by reaching across the partisan aisle, and working with political opponents in good faith and common purpose.”

From Condoleeza Rice’s remarks to the Republican National Convention, August 1, 2000:

“George W. Bush will work with Congress so that America speaks with one voice. He has demonstrated in this campaign that he will never use foreign policy for narrow partisan purposes.”


And from his concession speech next fall, “John Kerry will make a superb president”

President Bush on CIA director George Tenet, upon learning of his resignation, June 3, 2004:

“He’s been a strong and able leader at the agency, and I will miss him. I told him I’m sorry he’s leaving. He’s done a superb job on behalf of the American people.”

President Bush on Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, upon learning that a number of people were calling for his firing, May 10, 2004:

“You are courageously leading our nation in the war against terror. You are doing a superb job. You are a strong Secretary of Defense and our nation owes you a debt of gratitude.”

Grave Versus

Dubya, Dubya, Too

In today’s commencement address to recent graduates of the Air Force Academy, President Bush sought to make his modern-day War on Terror analogous to the heroic fighting of World War II. And in the grand tradition of Bush’s prior usage of black-and-white absolutism, the speech framed the current struggle in the Middle East in terms of very clear and sharp contrasts: right and wrong, good and bad, democracy and fascism, father and son, etc.
His speech was notably short on specifics, however. Admittedly, his communications director Dan Bartlett is probably very overworked right now, having to fend off an increasingly combative press and increasing dissension in the ranks of the Bush White House, so we thought we’d help and compile this list of additional WWII analogies Bush might have invoked this afternoon, had his writers and researchers been given more time.

World War II War on Terror™
United States criticized for being a bit late to begin fighting United States criticized for being a bit, well, early to begin fighting
Fighting against the Axis Powers Fighting against the Axis of Evil
The Germans? Not so cooperative. The Germans? Not so cooperative.
The French? Pussies. The French? Pussies.
Franz Ferdinand? So three decades ago. Franz Ferdinand? So three months ago.
Born from the ashes of the first W.W. Born from the loins of the first H.W.
Band of Brothers Band on the Run
Greatest Generation Greatest Generation (of capital for Halliburton and Bechtel)
No gay soldiers No gay soldiers, save for those who coordinated massive pile-ups of Iraqi prisoners and photographed their bare asses
A president confined to his wheelchair A president confined to Crawford, Texas
Green camouflage, and great uniforms Tan camouflage, and not enough Kevlar jackets
The War to End All Wars

D.C.-beat writers die of pun overdose



Worst Blog-Related Headline Ever

Sex-driven society won’t let sleeping blogs lie

Grave Unintentionally Hilarious

Unintentionally Hilarious Photo of the Moment, vol. 21



Next time, consider whipping Mandy Moore for two-plus hours

How not to mobilize your base during an introductory roll-out:
Weekend box office, May 28-30, 2004:

$345,000 (studio estimate)
20 screens

Weekend box office, February 27-29, 2004:

The Passion of the Christ
3,043 screens


Quelle surprise!

From “Choice Breaks Deadlock on New Government; Council Disbands“, the New York Times, June 1, 2004:

After the announcements [of appointments to the new prime minister’s cabinet], a member of the Iraqi Governing Council said the body would immediately dissolve rather than remain in office until the June 30 transfer of sovereignty.
Younadam Kana, a member of the council, told reporters that 20 of the 22 members of the American-appointed body agreed to disband.

Council member ambushed in Najaf“,, May 27, 2004
Head of Iraqi Governing Council Killed“, the Guardian, May 17, 2004
Iraq governing council member shot“,, September 20, 2003