In today’s commencement address to recent graduates of the Air Force Academy, President Bush sought to make his modern-day War on Terror analogous to the heroic fighting of World War II. And in the grand tradition of Bush’s prior usage of black-and-white absolutism, the speech framed the current struggle in the Middle East in terms of very clear and sharp contrasts: right and wrong, good and bad, democracy and fascism, father and son, etc.
His speech was notably short on specifics, however. Admittedly, his communications director Dan Bartlett is probably very overworked right now, having to fend off an increasingly combative press and increasing dissension in the ranks of the Bush White House, so we thought we’d help and compile this list of additional WWII analogies Bush might have invoked this afternoon, had his writers and researchers been given more time.
|World War II||War on Terror™|
|United States criticized for being a bit late to begin fighting||United States criticized for being a bit, well, early to begin fighting|
|Fighting against the Axis Powers||Fighting against the Axis of Evil|
|The Germans? Not so cooperative.||The Germans? Not so cooperative.|
|The French? Pussies.||The French? Pussies.|
|Franz Ferdinand? So three decades ago.||Franz Ferdinand? So three months ago.|
|Born from the ashes of the first W.W.||Born from the loins of the first H.W.|
|Band of Brothers||Band on the Run|
|Greatest Generation||Greatest Generation (of capital for Halliburton and Bechtel)|
|No gay soldiers||No gay soldiers, save for those who coordinated massive pile-ups of Iraqi prisoners and photographed their bare asses|
|A president confined to his wheelchair||A president confined to Crawford, Texas|
|Green camouflage, and great uniforms||Tan camouflage, and not enough Kevlar jackets|
|The War to End All Wars||…|
8 replies on “Dubya, Dubya, Too”
Oh Oh… I like this… 😉
The war to end all wars
The war to start them all
The war to build and image
The war to destroy one
The antithesis of Orwell’s 1984
Wow, this could go on forever!
The rescue of a nation
The destruction of another
love lowculture, but calling the soldiers gay b/c of the nude photos is a bit glib (in a bad way). Nudity and gay sex are much more taboo in muslim culture and sexual humiliation (as well as rape) is more about power and domination than sexual kicks. These scenes were designed to humiliate the Iraqis as much as possible, and some have speculated they were used to threaten blackmail.
Also, what about the women getting pregnant during all this? That’s not very gay.
re: the gay crack– god, i am such a right-winger sometimes. that, and a flip-flopper.
Sorry, didn’t catch the rush reference, but I did say glib, not offensive or even irksome. Like I said, love the site.
That is a nasty tie-in, the prison photos and gaity, though my first impression after seeing the notorious naked pyramid picture was of sodom. I immediately wondered who would be the first guy on Christopher St. to make a remark? You know there had to be one “first remark guy.”
Here though the issue is a non-issue because this bloggggg is dedicated to the interpretation of scripture from the 12th century.
A non-issue I tell ya.
That’s “gaiety” not gaity.
I don’t think Islam is tolerant of anything and from what I’ve read homosexuality is dangerous territory though it is surely present.
I would guess that the sex abuse used in the prison is actually much more common in the virginal Mid-East, just a guess.
The sex abuse was conceived and carried out by straight soilders. And pregnant to prove it! The accusation that ‘gay’ soilders ‘did it’ is bizarre and a sad refection on the writer and Low Culture.
It reads as pro-Bush propaganda, “It’s not Rumsfeld’s fault, it was those closet queers.”
BUSH and KERRY both STINK!!!
On May 11, 2004, John Kerry failed to show up to vote in the senate to extend unemployment benefits to hundreds of thousands of people out of work because of President Bush’s foolish economic, tax and trade policies. This bill failed to pass by ONLY ONE VOTE! – John Kerry’s. Moneybags Johnny couldn’t make it because he was much too busy campaigning in Kentucky – a state with terribly high unemployment.
Senator Kerry spends more time politicking and making jokes about how nice his hair is than he does actually taking care of his senatorial duties. The man has missed 75% of the votes and has cost his state millions upon millions of dollars. Now he wants to do the same for the nation.
Bush is a decisive idiot who is financially ruining this country but Mr. Kerry is a shameless liar who falsely prides himself on his superior intellect. So what are we going to do with these two gentlemen?
Personally, I’m voting for a 3rd party candidate. A third party candidate won’t get elected but a protest vote is very important nonetheless. Voting for a third party candidate could have far more impact than supporting status quo politicians.
Don’t throw your vote away by voting for either the selfish gigolo multimillionaire Kerry or the monkey-brained Mr. Bush.
And as far as terrorism goes, read “Osama’s Revenge.” According to the author, terrorists presently have 20 nuclear suitcase bombs (10 times more powerful than Hiroshima’s) that they plan to set off within a year. Thank you Republican and Democratic leaders.