The President’s quote in the headline above comes by way of Bush Estimates 30,000 Iraqis Killed, the Washington Post, December 12, 2005…
Fair enough. And what, you may ask, defines a “challenge”? How about the experiences yet to be had by the young girl below, grieving over the corpse of her gunned-down daddy? She can at least always be thankful that he didn’t die in one of Saddam’s infamous torture rooms, because then, you see, she would be angry and bitter about his death at the hands of an all-powerful, violent government entity. It’s so much better this way. Our way. The American way.
“Setbacks”? Here’s venturing a good guess that this kid below underwent quite a setback when his leg was blown off. Really, lad…no child will be left behind, we’ll just expect you to work that much harder to catch up with the rest of us as you hobble along the streets of your newly-democratic Iraq.
“False starts”? An improperly-timed beginning, as in the case of the boy pictured below. Wait, that’s wrong. An improperly-timed end, e.g. this kid never really got to start his life because now he’s fucking dead as a result of an invasion enacted under false pretenses.
Remember, kids, keep those photos coming! We’re compiling the best of them for our limited-edition “God Wanted You to Die” commemorative PDF.
Month: December 2005
From “Carey, Legend, West Lead Grammy Nods“, the Associated Press, December 8, 2005:
[Mariah] Carey’s eight nominations tied John Legend and Kanye West. Soul crooner Legend’s nominations included best new artist, while West is up for album of the year for “Late Registration” and song of the year for “Gold Digger.” “I feel incredible,” said Legend, a West protege whose debut “Get Lifted” was a million-seller. “You put a lot of expectations into what you want the record to be.”
Other multiple nominees included 50 Cent, Gwen Stefani, U2 and Bruce Springsteen.
From the Academy’s list of official nominees:
12. Dance Recording: “Galvanize,” The Chemical Brothers featuring Q- Tip; “Say Hello,” Deep Dish: “Wonderful Night,” Fatboy Slim & Lateef; “Daft Punk Is Playing at My House,” LCD Soundsystem; “I Believe in You,” Kylie Minogue; “Guilt Is a Useless Emotion,” New Order.
13. Electronic/Dance Album: “Push the Button,” The Chemical Brothers; “Human After All,” Daft Punk; “Palookaville,” Fatboy Slim; “Minimum- Maximum,” Kraftwerk; “LCD Soundsystem,” LCD Soundsystem.
See, it’s always good for the DFA-haters to get some perspective.
It’s almost enough to make one think there still exists a segment of the record-buying populace who hasn’t heard Murphy’s debut album. Have these poor people not set foot in an Urban Outfitters this past year?
An actual quote from our actual president at yesterday’s White House Children’s Holiday Reception:
“This is Laura; I’m George W. We hope you’ve had some fun here. I hope nobody pinched Rudolph on the nose. Nobody did? That’s good. Rudolph is happy about that, too.”
Because it’s a novel endeavor to imply that President Bush is a sub-literate imbecile, get it? That’s the essence of easy laughter.
Just ask top-tier comedy writers everywhere!