The Onion: In the book, you publish a letter you wrote concerning an unfilmed script, Male Pattern Baldness, which you say had the potential to ‘force America to pay attention.’ What did you mean by that, and what is Male Pattern Baldness about?
Joe Eszterhas: Male Pattern Baldness was about a guy who lives in the Midwest and works in a steel plant, who finds himself in a battle with all the precepts of political correctness. He’s just an ordinary guy who goes up against all the sort of politically inspired and enforced social rules that we’ve looked at in the past 20 years. Everything goes to hell for him. He loses his wife as a result. He loses his son, and he has to take anger-management classes. Ultimately, he can’t take it. The tone of the piece until now is comedic, it’s dark, and it has a really striking comedic tone, to the point where Betty Thomas, who directs comedies, after reading it decided that she was going to make it. Suddenly, near the end of this piece, the comedic tone startlingly ends and he goes on a rampage and kills four or five of his workers and kills himself. The movie ends with an epilogue of irony. Betty’s take and the studio’s take when I sold the script was that it was very hard-hitting, and was certainly going to be very controversial. It proved to be so controversial, finally, in the studio’s view, and also Betty’s—she felt that it was an assault on political correctness—that they opted not to do the picture, and it’s still up on the shelf. I do think that it would have startled some people, and I think it would have made us take a hard look at the effects of political correctness.