We Need a Montage

Paging Mr. Eisenstein: The world mourns the the passing of the Pope and record high oil prices. (via Reuters Pictures)


low culture Exclusive: Prince Harry’s Wedding Outfit

Related: Prince Charles Pushes Wedding Back a Day.
Elsewhere: Deconstructing Harry


‘A-‘ Shows Improvement



Luckily, We Can Read Vulpine Lips

“I know, it’s crazy, right? I’m basically a murderer thousands and thousands of times over and spent billions of dollars on a project that’s not nearly over and which will deepen America’s defecit for generations. Honestly, I can barely balance my own checkbook! Man, someone up there must like me.”
Related: “You sendin’ The Wolf?… Shit Negro, that’s all you had to say.”
(via Reuters)

Satirical Shallow

On April Fool’s Day, The Whole World (Wide Web) Is A Target
by Sarah Boxer

fools.jpgBloggers, or ‘Web loggers,’ may not have invented April Fool’s Day (that would be Pope Gregory with his conversion to the eponymous Gregorian Calendar in 1582), but as with so many other things, they have taken credit for improving on it.
As the clock struck midnight on April first, several prominent bloggers created puckish, at times almost humorous, stabs at April Fool’s content. As you might expect, many were parodies of other websites and the conventions of the medium. “Bloggers are a world onto themselves,” said Jeff Jarvis, who runs the website and who actually called this reporter himself assuming she’d be doing this story. “So, of course, they’d parody their world.”


A Modest Proposal

Father Guido Sarducci

April Shallow Shallow

One Word For You: Premium

Remember the party scene in The Graduate where Benjamin Braddock is buttonholed by his father’s friend who has one word for him, “Just one word”?
Well, we have one word for you: Premium.
Due to the amazing success of our reader feedback module (you know, the little “Did you find this content useful?” radio buttons that have sprouted up on this site like wild flowers on the side of the highway), we’ve decided to go premium. Following the successful model of Salon and several other pay-per-view sites, we’ve implemented a premium area to provide our core readers with the best this site has to offer.
Membership has its privileges:
– Only Premium subscribers can turn off pop-ups and sirens.
– Premium members get a 10% discount at the low culture store.
– Premium members get customized content: no more ‘Shallow’ posts for all you political junkies; no more ‘Grave’ for all you pop culture vultures.
– Premium members are automatically signed up to receive information from our advertisers and special weekly e-promotions.
Sign up now!

April Grave

Outed: Lewis “Scooter” Libby (Libby? Here, that’s shorthand for “conservative”)

As Special Prosecutor Patrick J. Fitzgerald puts the finishing touches on his recent efforts to determine a) whether or not a crime was committed two summers prior when the identity of a CIA employee was revealed to the public by a then-unidentified White House source, and b) whether or not Judith Miller and a less well-known reporter for Time magazine will be jailed for their role in masking the source’s identity, tongues on Capitol Hill are wagging in gleeful anticipation – but for altogether different reasons than you might have expected.
Why, you ask? Well, White House followers may finally learn the sexuality of the purported informant, Lewis Libby, as other sources in the investigation are revealing that a series of anecdotes indicate that…

April Shallow

Just Wild About Geli: The Crazy Days—And Even Crazier Nights—Of the Jet-Set’s Newest ‘It’ Girl

geli.jpgGeli Raubal hates the word ‘celebutante.’
“It’s not even a real word!” she protests.
When I point out that ‘celebutante’ is a word—a portmanteau word, in fact, Geli sticks her tongue out playfully and says what she always says when the absurdity of the word flies smack-dab into her flawless, porcelain face: “Pish-posh. What does it mean anyway? That I should get special treatment because I have a famous relative? That I should get into clubs ahead of the line or get free clothes from designers just because of the family I was born into? Pish-posh!”
But like other young ladies in her caste—Paris Hilton, Bijou Phillips, Kimberley Stewart, and the Bush twins come to mind—she does get special treatment and free clothes. She even gets into clubs ahead of the line. All because she’s the favorite niece of her famous, well-connected, powerful uncle. And who is her uncle, the man who dotes on her like she’s his own? Well, you’ve certainly heard of him, unless you’ve been living in a bunker.

April Shallow

Sloppy Seconds

Fever Pitch, 2005… Other image available to Premium members only
Some ideas are just homeruns!