The Blurbin’ Fool Presents: Thanksgiving at the Movies

As anyone who’s been disowned by his family and rejected by even his mail-order bride knows, the only thing to do on Thanksgiving when you’re painfully alone is to see a lot of movies. It’s so much easier to cry in a dark movie theater, but it’s even better to laugh!
Here are my blurbs for this holiday weekend’s releases. Messrs. Ebert and Roeper, eat your hearts out:
National Treasure: A national disaster!
Kinsey: Hideous Kinsey!
The Incredibles: Incredibly bad!
Bad Education: You said it, not me!
Alexander: Alexander the So-So!
Finding Neverland: Lose it!
Ray: Gay!
After the Sunset: Ratner scores again! A roller-coaster ride of thrills and laughs: a witty tropical romp that’s as cool as a Daiquiri and twice as intoxicating!