Categories
Shallow

Hack Writers, Start Your Puns

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Tomorrow, NBC premieres the latest entry in the decline of Western Civilization Reality TV genre, The Biggest Loser in which some people do something to win some money or maybe something else. It’s gonna be awesome—or something.
Since most TV critics are filing their reviews with their editors right about now, I thought I’d offer them some help with their inevitable shitty puns and fat jokes. Feel free to use any of the following phrases in your articles or headlines, or um, become a better writer:
·Fat Tuesday
·Weighty Matter
·Light-Weight Entertainment
·Thick as Thieves
·Chubby-Hubby
·The Weight Is Over
·Big Men and Women on Campus
·Fat of the Land
·Big, Fat Obnoxious [Anything]
·Big, Fat Hit
·Weighed Down
·Heavy/Meta
·Well-Rounded Cast
·Fatty Ass-heads
·Must Eat TV
·Hungry for Ratings
·Fat Chance
·Battle of the Bulge
·Thin Premise
·Fat Sells
·Big Competition
·Chubby Reign
·Waist of Airtime
·Devouring the Competition
·Chewing the Scenery
·Broad Humor
·The Thickest Link
·Livin’ Large
·Large and in Charge
·Wide Margin
·Fat of the Land
·Meaty
·Morbidly [Anything]
·Gut-Busting
·Phat