October 22, 2004
New York Post Really, Really, Really Endorses Bush. Really. For Real.
tell (n) A mannerism that gives away your holdings. Smiling when you have a big (very good) hand is an obvious tell. More subtle tells include iris dilation, a throbbing pulse, or acting in a certain manner in a given situation.

sub·text (n.) The implicit meaning or theme of a literary text.

These are not strong words of endorsement:

...quite good enough for us...

...Not flawlessly, not by a long shot, but competently enough...


...No Child Left Behind act may mark the beginning of true reform...

...Quite well...

...enormous headway in eliminating threats...

... Iraq, of course, remains a work in progress. But all wars are "two steps forward, one step back" propositions; this one is no different...

...it is true that no weapons of mass destruction were found in Iraq...

...Yes, Osama bin Laden — if he is in fact alive — remains at large...

...Again, WMDs were not found....

...U.S. efforts in Iraq are not finished. More than 1,000 troops have died, and billions have been spent. And pockets of strong resistance remain....

...New York, by the way, benefited disproportionately from Bush's tax cuts — because they were geared, in part, to aid Wall Street...

Wow, with endorsements like that, who needs endorsements?

But perhaps the key phrase—typed with hams on fist by an unreliable narrator worthy of Nabokov—is this withering appraisal of Osama bin Laden:

[H]e is increasingly a general without an army, and he is off-balance and on the run.

Really, really, really sounds like someone else, doesn't it? Really. For Real.

Posted in a Grave fashion.

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