Weight Watch: Lindsay Lohan, Nicole Ritchie, and...Condi Rice?

President Bush with Secretary of State, Condoleezza Rice and two other unidentified people settle in at Washington Nationals games against the Toronto Blue Jays at RFK Stadium, Friday, June 24, 2005, in Washington. (AP Photo/Lawrence Jackson)

Okay, Now I'm Definitely Against Human Cloning

Army of Headless Clones: Protestors condemn John Bolton, via Yahoo/AFP.

Related: "Malkovich, Malkovich, Malkovich."

And later, when I google "Laden", "Jet", and "Crash", I'll reach this article

Via the brilliant headline writers at the Associated Press, Thursday, June 16, 2005:

Bomb-laden jet crashes in backyard

Phoenix â€' A U.S. Marine Corps jet carrying four 500-pound bombs crashed into the backyard of a home during a training exercise, but the pilot ejected safely and only one person on the ground was slightly injured, authorities said.

"Move on"? While we're at it, we'll also forgive and forget you and your cronies' innumerable past indiscretions, too

"Science", perhaps better known in academic circles as "the Grand Arch-Nemesis of the Bush Administration," has once again reared its ugly, evolved, ozone-reducing head to embarrass the White House and its henchmen. Specifically, the startling revelation from Florida that autopsy results from that ol' Terri Schiavo incident did, in fact, confirm the suspicion held by the vast majority of Americans that the martyr-in-question was, effectively, brain dead. No hope of revival. Like, dead. Doorknob. Et cetera.

From "Frist: Schiavo Autopsy Results End Case," via the Associated Press:

"The diagnosis they made is exactly right. It's the pathology, I'll respect that. I think it's time to move on," Frist said on CBS' "The Early Show."

EARLIER: "Frist views video, disputes Schiavo diagnosis: Senator’s comments raise eyebrows in medical, political circles", the Washington Post, March 19, 2005

OTHER SHIT WE'VE ALREADY FORGOTTEN ABOUT BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT IT WAS BEST TO MOVE ON IN THE CULTURE WARS, THE WAR ON TERRORISM, ETC.:

The initially-proposed $15 million in aid for tsunami relief efforts
Joseph Wilson and Valerie Plame
16 words (including "Niger" and "uranium")
Richard Clarke and Condoleeza Rice's 9/11 memorandum
The proposed modification of the Constitution to placate the religious right ("Gay Marriage" edition)
The proposed modification of the Constitution to placate the religious right ("Activist Judges" edition)
Last month's Downing Street memo
Paul O'Neill's account that the Iraq invasion was planned prior to 9/11
L. Paul Bremer's warning that the U.S. had troop shortages in Iraq
The war in Iraq

Et cetera. Ad infinitum.

And how does one say "immunity" in Latin?

OK, Mr. President, then please explain why this image gives me more cause for alarm than it does comfort me

Well, At Least One Base Won't Be Closing

Gitmo' Money, Gitmo' Problems: Take down the sign, boys, we're back in business!

"Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld said Wednesday that the Bush administration was not considering shutting down the detention center at Guantánamo Bay, Cuba, and he defended the treatment of its prisoners by their American military guards and interrogators as humane."
- Rumsfeld Says Guantánamo Isn't Being Considered for Closing, by Thom Shanker, The New York Times, June 9, 2005

Related: Pentagon to Release Data on Base Closings, AP/Guardian, May 28, 2005

From sunrise to sunset; from one Turkey to another

Here's President Bush's schedule for today, by way of the Washington Post's White House Briefing for June 8, 2005:

Today's Calendar:

Bush met this morning with Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan.

Also today, he speaks about Social Security before a meeting of builders and contractors at the Capital Hilton, sits down for an interview with Neil Cavuto of Fox News to be shown this afternoon, and meets with Republican congressional leaders.

Tonight he is scheduled to watch "Cinderella Man" at the White House.

Think of it as another employee discount

General Motors said Tuesday that it would cut about 25,000 jobs from its blue-collar work force in the United States by the end of 2008, in a broad move to reckon with its declining grip on the American car market.

The cuts, which represent about 22 percent of the hourly work force, would bring G.M.'s nationwide employment to 86,000 hourly workers, roughly the number it employed in the city of Flint, Mich., in the 1970's.
- G.M. Will Reduce Hourly Workers in U.S. by 25,000, by Danny Hakim, The New York Times, June 8, 2005.

Related: GM Employee Discount for Everyone Event

Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah...

A military inquiry has found that guards or interrogators at the Guantánamo Bay detention center in Cuba kicked, stepped on and splashed urine on the Koran, in some cases intentionally but in others by accident, the Pentagon said on Friday.
[...]
The investigation into allegations that the Koran had been mishandled also found that in one instance detainees' Korans were wet because guards on the night shift had thrown water balloons on the cellblock.
- Military Details Koran Incidents at Base in Cuba, by Eric Schmitt, The New York Times, June 4, 2005.

Dear Mom and Dad,
Greetings from Camp X Ray where if the food doesn't kill ya, something else probably will! Ha ha ha. Just kidding.

Love, Your Son