Def Condi Jam

Funny Lady: Secretary of State Rice on her first day at the State Department, Jan. 27, 2005 (via Reuters)

"Thank you, thank you. What a great audience out there. Really, I'm not just saying that: you're a great group. You wanna know another great group? The U.N. Or, as I like to call them, 'The United Colors of Benetton!'

"Funny thing about the U.N., and this is a true story! I was there a couple of days ago for a big meeting and one of the aides said to me, 'Do you know where Kofi is?' So, I looked her dead in the eyes and said, 'Listen, just 'cause my title says Secretary doesn't mean I'm gonna get you coffee!' Oh, boy! She turned green then red then blue: talk about united colors!

"I'm outta time. Good night folks, you've been great! Don't forget to tip your server."

January 30th, 2005: This Birthday's Gonna Be da' Bomb!

For a Man With A Whole Lotta Heart (Problems)

"Suicide bombs and mortars killed at least 27 people, but voters still came out in force for the first multi-party poll in 50 years. In some places they cheered with joy at their first chance to cast a free vote, in others they shared chocolates." - Iraqis Brave Bombs to Vote in Their Millions, Reuters, Jan. 30, 2005.

"Mr. Cheney was born in Lincoln, Nebraska, on January 30, 1941 and grew up in Casper, Wyoming..." - White House bio

Last Year: Present Accomplished

Ideological Corrections: For the Record

From "Corrections," The New York Times, Jan. 29, 2005:

Because of an editing error, an article yesterday about Condoleezza Rice's first day as secretary of state referred incorrectly to her coming trip to the Mideast. She will meet Palestinian leaders in the West Bank, not in Israel.

On Sunday, would these six Iraqis have voted for the United Iraqi Alliance, or, maybe, the Assembly of Independent Democrats?

I guess we'll never know.

RELATED: Major parties and alliances, the Associated Press

And Now for Something Important...

Cheney Criticized for Attire at Auschwitz Ceremony, Reuters

Cheney's Attire Draws Ire, CBS News

Cheney criticized for Auschwitz attire, Swissinfo

Fashion Writer Tsks Cheney's Wardrobe Malfunction, FOX News

Dick Cheney, Dressing Down, Washington Post

Cheney Under Fire For Attire At Auschwitz Ceremony, Jackson Channel

Oh, and some other issues of note:

Five US soldiers, eight Iraqis killed in pre-election attacks, Turkish Press

Two Friends Talking: A One Act Play

Blair Calls on United States to Cooperate With Rest of the World, by Alan Cowell, The New York Times, Jan. 27, 2005.

TB: Mr. President, you need to cooperate with the rest of the world, sir.
GWB: Aw, hoss. Why you ridin' my ass?
TB: Mr. Bush, I'm quite serious on this matter.
GWB: 'Quite serious!' Fah-fah-fah, I'm an Englisher! Spotted dick!
TB: Now listen here, Mr. President: I shan't allow you to mock my accent. The world needs unity.
GWB: Shan't. That's funny, hoss. You callin' me from a dang car phone, Tonesy?
TB: Busted, sir.
GWB: Now you know you can't be callin' me from no car phone, man! Ashcroft's got one of them scanners: Laura and I gotta turn on the bathroom sinks just to talk dirty. You can't be callin' me from no car phone, hoss.
TB: Yes, sir. Well, Mr. President, I'm almost to my destination. Please do try to cooperate with the rest of the world.
GWB: Alright, hoss. You know I'd do anything for you, Tone. You're my boy. You're my boy, Blue! You're my boy! You get that over there in Britland, Tony? Ya' get it?
TB: Yes, Mr. President. I saw Old School. Very amusing. I, um, must go now. I'm getting another call. It's Nelson Mandela.
GWB: Nelson? He's my boy, too—
TB: Breaking... breaking up, sir.
[click]
GWB: Tony? Tony? Damn dial tone. Get it? Tony, Tony, Tone? Ya' get that, hoss? Damn, I'm talkin' to myself here.

[with respect to David Rees: You're my boy, Rees!]

Here's to a great second term!

"America's vital interests and our deepest beliefs are now one. From the day of our founding, we have proclaimed that every man and woman on this earth has rights, and dignity, and matchless value, because they bear the image of the maker of heaven and earth. Across the generations, we have proclaimed the imperative of self-government, because no one is fit to be a master, and no one deserves to be a slave. Advancing these ideals is the mission that created our nation. It is the honorable achievement of our fathers. Now it is the urgent requirement of our nation's security, and the calling of our time.

So it is the policy of the United States to seek and support the growth of democratic movements and institutions in every nation and culture, with the ultimate goal of ending tyranny in our world."

-- From President Bush's second inaugural speech, January 20, 2005

I voted today. Did you? (Also, my mom took the crusts off of my sandwich.)

Iraqi youngsters display an election pamphlet, as a British soldier on patrol in the southern Iraqi city of Basra, looks on, Wednesday Jan. 2005, as Iraq heads for national elections scheduled for January 30.(AP Photo/Odd Anderson, pool)

Children examine election posters displayed on a campaign vehicle as Kurdish women's rights activists raise election awareness among poor and often illiterate women in suburbs of Arbil, Wednesday, Jan. 26. 2005. Kurds are expected to attend the forthcoming elections in Iraq in overwhelming numbers thus strengthening their position in the interim Iraqi parliament. (AP Photo/Sasa Kralj)

You can't handle the truth!

From Powell gives bleak assessment of Iraq security problems, by Guy Dinmore in Washington for the Financial Times, January 13 2005:

According to Chas Freeman, former US ambassador to Saudi Arabia and head of the independent Middle East Policy Council, Mr Bush recently asked Mr Powell for his view on the progress of the war. "We're losing," Mr Powell was quoted as saying. Mr Freeman said Mr Bush then asked the secretary of state to leave.

Or, directly from Mr. Freeman's mouth, by way of the transcript of his appearance at the recent Capitol Hill Conference Series on U.S. Middle East Policy, Iraq, Afghanistan, and the War on "Terror", January 11, 2005:

Anyway, the other day I understand that someone went into the Oval Office - someone known to everybody here, a rather senior person who is on his way out of the administration - and was asked by the president what was going on in Iraq, and said, with his characteristic bluntness, we're losing - and was asked to leave the office forthwith and not continue the discussion.

So there's a question about what is going on in Iraq, and perhaps the competition between reality-based analysis, much disparaged in Washington these days, and hallucinatory optimism, which is the alternative.

Debates 2004: "Exaggerations," "Lies," and "Mistruths" revisited

From the San Francisco Chronicle, Wednesday, January 26, 2005:

Bush adds $80 billion to wars' costs; Afghanistan, Iraq tally would pass $300 billion if OKd

But what to make of this, dated a whopping three months earlier (Friday, October 1, 2004), from the Washington Post's analysis of the first Presidential debate between candidates George W. Bush and John Kerry:

Few Factual Errors, but Truth Got Stretched at Times

Kerry suggested that the United States has spent $200 billion on Iraq, largely because it supplied the bulk of the troops. This was an exaggeration because it combined the amount already spent -- about $120 billion -- with money that is expected to be spent in the coming year or requested by the administration.

In case you're interested in researching more of Candidate Kerry's various lies and deceptions, rest assured that various media outlets displayed an eerie amount of non-prescience last fall. Why not comb through the following links, as well? They're each chock full of documentation of Kerry's $200 billion mendacity...

Distortions and Misstatements At First Presidential Debate, Bush and Kerry both have problems with the facts at their meeting in Coral Gables, (FactCheck.org)

A Primer for Tonight's First Debate, Both Bush and Kerry Have Set the Stage With Some Misleading Claims, (Washington Post)

Some key claims in debate and how they really stack up, (Knight Ridder/The Seattle Times)

Reality Check: Distorted Debates, (WCCO TV)